Shrek is a twelve foot tall, green, upright, humanoid creature from Scottish folklore. According to ancient Scottish legends, the creature lives in a remote swamp, though exactly where varies in each legend. Legends say the creature is followed closely by what they say is a 'demonic' donkey that can talk. Legends say Shrek emmits a terrible smell, and modern sightings often describe an onion-like smell that burns their eyes around him. On one occaison, in 1967, a man claimed he wandered into a swamp with a large house with a fifteen foot tall doorway and thirteen foot tall outhouse, with two foot long footprints that appeared to be only partially bare outside, as if whatever made them was wearing shoes with holes in them. The anonymous witness then claimed he smelt a horrible strong onion smell coming from behind him, before a loud, deep voice with a thick Scottish accent scream the words 'What are you doing in my swamp?'. He claims the creature then threw him over his shoulder and took him into his house where he threw him into a pen with a large, black donkey with glowing red eyes in it. After screaming for a few hours, he asked the creature why he smelt like onions. 'Ogres are like onions.' It replied. They sat in silence for the rest of the encounter, before the man posted it on facebook with his phone. The Facebook post also contained a video featured below claiming to show Shrek. After this, he was shortly declared 'missing', and after many searches of the area where he was believed to have dissapeared, he was considered dead. Ancient Scottish legends say that if you pay Shrek enough money, he will teach you how to dance like an Ogre, and plays hisinfamous favourite song on the bagpipes. The band Smash Mouth later added lyrics to the song and named it All Star. The song was featured in the movie series based off of Shrek, which used actuall alleged recordings of Shrek for some scenes.
Possible explanations Edit
- A species of large, human-like ape
- An alien or spirit
- The second coming of Christ
- A living Neanderthal-like creature